Notes about me: I have been able to go back to work and sit in my little cluttered office and interact with my team. My one frustration is that in a week we move to a new building and “the powers that be” who plan space and decide the value of staff are dead set on breaking up teams. My office will be in a room of small cubicles and in a different building from my manager and team. I suspect the one benefit is I will be working from home more and can be near Tina, because the cube rooms are terrible for productivity and there really is no value to me driving to Redmond to be in a different building vs just working over the net.
Yesterday was Tina’s first Chemo day. Lots of stuff going on.
First of all we have asked SCCA for a new medical oncologist. Over the last few days we had a severe personality conflict. Tina and I are intelligent people who get value and avoid stress by understanding what’s going on. I also manage processes and often do projects where I broker communication. Our oncologist seems TO US annoyed, if not a bit threatened, when we ask questions, or wanted to understand the value in repeating a very painful biopsy that was done just four weeks prior. In the end we were right, there was no need for the test, but to the very end the oncologist was dedicated to justifying the original request, even though the gyno oncologist when asked, quickly confirmed our suspicions that the painful test was not needed twice.
At one point when the Oncologist could not answer what the value of doing the same painful biopsy was, the oncologist pulled the “And where did you get your advanced medical degree” card. Really.. that is the best you have after 10 years in Med school etc? I pulled the “I am a professional project manager and work at creating clear communication between project stake holders all the time” card. Education doesn’t intimidate me…
I may not be a trained car mechanic, but when my mechanic wants to flush my transmission twice in a month, I am smart enough to question this call. SCCA’s patient relations rep Connie was a star in helping us get the right answer to our question, keeping Tina from being bullied into a painful unneeded procedure and now helping us find an oncologist that is a better match for us.
Getting Lucky in Chemo
In case you don’t know Chemo drugs are designed to target cells that are actively reproducing at a faster rates. Given Tina’s tumor grew to a freeking 12 cm in less than year, I am sure our cancer fits that profile. [assuming there are any cancer cells left, remember we are lucky in that this is a proactive after a very successful tumor removal] Unfortunately for the patient, hair follicles, finger nails, blood cells and the entire lining of your GI tract from mouth to “exit port” also fit the bill. This is why you lose your hair, need immune treatements and tend to have digestive issues. Chemo is cumulative so this week’s relatively easy reactions may get worse.. and we are pretty sure her hair head’s hair has few days before it goes. Though for some reason armpit hair isn’t affected.. sigh… Also digestion and waste clearing goes down hill.. it will recover… but still who wants to have flu-like symptoms for several weeks.
For all the anticipatory stress and Hollywood images of cancer patients getting chemo, it was a much more pleasant process then talking with our Medical Oncologist. The port Tina had installed made the infusion of a half-dozen different drugs so much easier than an IV. SCCA clearly has this down to an art and our nurse for the 3 hour process was both professional and pleasant.
There was about an hour of just infusing anti-nausea meds before we got to the main feature. Then the first drug Doxorubicon comes in three large RED ominous syringes that need to be infused over 5 minutes each.
“Mr Bond.. when the third plunger has fallen, your days will end..”
It reminded me of an episode of Alias or James Bond. “Mr Bond.. when the third plunger has fallen, your days will end..” [insert deep maniacal laughter here-- BTW my 9 year daughter does a very disconcerting villain laugh.. I hope this does not foreshadow a future career in tax collections or something]. The infusion machine does both syringes and IV bags automatically so the nurse can manager many infusion bays at the same time. To make the RED syringes more ominous.. every time the nurse comes in to change out the syringe .. she puts on a disposable safety gown.. to protect her from exposure.. Ok I feel lots better now… maybe not
Tina took a full anxiety pill near the start of this.. Better than a Tequila Sunrise for loosening her up. She is in the bed, I am in the recliner next to her… Lots of time to talk and hold hands.. and she did get very flirty and cute.. In general it was a pretty good date for two parents of a 9-year-old doing cancer treatments. We even got a little titillating in the talk and also worked out the expectations for physical affection during our tour of cancer treatments and boob reconstruction. I can safely say that under less medically intense times.. this date was going to end up with us having all sorts of fun.. We settled for and enjoyed a burger at a local bar with some beer /cider and some pleasant affection at home that culminated with our 9-year-old shouting from her room “I can hear you smooching!” mood over… ok not really.. we moved it to the next room SMOOCH!
In reality we had been doing some re-courting and re-bonding in the months before the cancer was found.. and this process has only increased that.. but with less sex..
And a good Puck
Ok it was a fun title.. but it refers to the fact that I trained Tina on the new grinder and espresso machine and one of the signs of a good espresso batch is the grounds in the porta-filter fall out as a single solid puck. I got one last night.. the filter looked like it has been washed.. so I had a good date.. some smooching and a good puck.. what more could you ask for?
Not so fast!! This is Chemo…
Tina after over doing her first post chemo dinner and coffee party.. did have about an hour of nausea and tears.. partly because she was so giddy after an easy session and some beer it was just a big ol’ slap in the face to remind her.. this is chemo.. [but honestly onion rings, a cheeseburger, beer, bread pudding and two coffees would have made her ill without chemo].. so its humus, crackers and cucumbers today..
But she has one drug that is a mood relaxer and nausea preventer so she was only sad and sick for about an hour.. and pretty cute and chatty afterwards until bed time.