Kicking Breast Cancer's Butt

Monthly Archives: May 2014

I wonder if this is how astronauts feel?

Three days out from surgery day, and I’m starting to tweak out.  I have only one half of a Xanax left, and if my primary care physician doesn’t approve a refill, I need to save that for surgery day just to get me in the door of the surgery center.

I’m waiting on the call from the surgeon’s office, to tell me when I need to check in.  I had planned to veg out over Perry Mason and forget everything else, but I have not been able to relax.  I keep thinking about how after this weekend, when Michaela goes back to school, I will be going into surgery.  And I. Am. Freaking. Out.

We’re 11 days out from stage I of the DIEP flap surgery.  It’s sort of daunting, thinking about what I’m about to undertake, and how much I have ahead of me, and how much I’m going to be hurting.  Then there are the incisions and drains, and worrying how I’m going to wash my hair when I can’t lift my arms over my head for at least 4 weeks…

Then I think about how very far I’ve come already, and I know.   I’ve got this.