What Men Think
So, Tina had an unexpected reaction to the first MRI attempt. A panic attack. Well if you have never been in one of these things. Imagine a nightmare where a large donut is eating you. Then your alarm clock goes off for 20 minutes and you can’t move to turn it off. Oh and its louder than a live Led Zepplin concert. First time I was out in the lobby.
Second time, after a Zanix pill (usually reserved for flying etc.) and with me now in the room. She got through it. Trust me if they tried to put an MRI in Gitmo, the President would assure us it was never used on prisoners. 20 minutes of the loudest noises every half second or so and I might tell them where I buried Jimmy Hoffa…..
At first it sounds like the world’s best alarm clock, screeching screeching screeching every second or less. I am sitting there at the end holding and stroking her ankle.. the part that is sticking out of the donut. Then I realize.. my head is bobbing back and forth. OMG!! its just like Steve Martin in “The Jerk”, I have found the a rhythm that moves my white fat man soul!!. Pathetic…
Then I look down.. at the side of the big white donut… Some perverse marketing team named it “Symphony” ya right. They should copyright the first three minutes of this thing’s noise corner the world wide alarm clock business… Yet… every pass it makes the harmonic of the noise shifts. Ironically around 12 minutes there is a pass, that I swear could be the base harmony for a Phillip Glass symphony… I can see it now. Benoroya Hall, the Seattle Symphony and the big white donut on stage.. doing “Ode to Loud Tech” by Phillip Glass.
The other thing. The dark mood lighting like on TV in”House” is not there. Its not dark with dim blue floor lights. It’s lit like an ER exam room.. Whats up with that?
This is where my brain goes for 2o minutes, while I hold Tina’s leg to let her know I am with her, as the machine searches inside her breast for info we really need to move forward. That and I was also watching her breathing to make sure she wasn’t stressing out..
Ladies.. that is what a man thinks while sitting next to the MRI.. much more fun to write about .. after being told “The Donut” saw no problems in the adjacent lymph nodes..
Tomorrow its several hours with “the team”.. starting with The Surgeon… more reality…